tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post3747418753438492224..comments2022-12-05T01:59:51.484-05:00Comments on Blessings in Disguise: Would you like to try my shoes on?Elizabethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04427608278914315657noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-75436563051934590712011-11-20T16:01:02.601-05:002011-11-20T16:01:02.601-05:00You were exactly right when you said: "You ch...You were exactly right when you said: "You chose your path and I have chosen mine, and they are both difficult roads to travel." There is no blanket solution that fits for every family. There is a lot to be said for biological connections and the abandonment issues that adoptees grow up with BUT there is also a lot to be said for the effects of instability on a child who maybe should have been placed for adoption. There is no cookie cutter solution to an unplanned pregnancy. The fact of the matter is - there is a child and as the parents, it is our responsibility to make decisions to benefit the well being of that child. We can only make those decisions based on our experience, knowledge, and areas of expertise at that point in time. We may end up regretting those decisions, we may get down the road and realize we made the absolute wrong decision, we may get to the other side and realize we did everything right. But the point is, we did the best we could in that moment and in the end, that is all that matters. Whether we are single moms, birth moms, adoptive moms or a mom living post-abortion - we live with the decision we made and we make the most of the situation as it stands. It is not ultimately about us, it's about providing the most secure future for our children, no matter how we do it. <br />I am so sorry you had to experience judgment and criticism all over again. I don't think it ever gets easier but maybe now you have opened her eyes (even if she doesn't see it or you don't see it) to what it means to give up something for your child and she can start to deal with the things in her life that she has given up or needs to give up for her boys. It's about them. *hugs*Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-58544563671400446472011-11-18T15:09:42.874-05:002011-11-18T15:09:42.874-05:00ugggh this blog made my blood boil! How dare she m...ugggh this blog made my blood boil! How dare she make you feel like scum like that!! I'm so sorry! and ummmmm I don't think someone like that you should consider a "friend"!BumbersBumblingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15804403640550027122noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-15870656842547677602011-11-17T15:03:19.681-05:002011-11-17T15:03:19.681-05:00"I just know why I do it" You do it beca..."I just know why I do it" You do it because your little girl is worth it. Your banner says it all. You chose what you thought was best for HER not YOU and isn't that what is at the very core of motherhood?<br /><br />The "friend" who messaged you is ignorant, as in uneducated. She only knows her way. You know what was the best choice for your baby, not her. As far as all babies wanting their mothers, this is true. But they want their mothers' love and acceptance. You will undoubtedly prove to her how much she was loved for the rest of her life. And, luckily for her, she has the love of TWO mothers. She is going to be just fine.<br /><br />I pray for peace for you. Your heart needs tenderness and kindness not the judgmental, ignorant ramblings of a so-called friend.<br /><br />Hugs.Laciehttp://funnylittlepollywogs.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-25354057915322903502011-11-15T23:20:30.229-05:002011-11-15T23:20:30.229-05:00I found your blog from another blog and just wante...I found your blog from another blog and just wanted to tell you: you are my hero! Truly, you are an amazing, selfless woman. And I would say that also makes you a darn good MOTHER! I have said a prayer for you that God would give you his joy and comfort.<br />Blessings.Jamie Leahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17158982197735904354noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-37946250443703462862011-11-12T12:27:10.344-05:002011-11-12T12:27:10.344-05:00I think you need to send her that last message. Y...I think you need to send her that last message. You're not putting yourself on a pedestal by sending it - in fact, you're humbling yourself. I hate that when people say, "I could NEVER do that." They're right. They couldn't. But to hear that on that specific day hurt more, I know. People who think being a birthmother is the "easy way out" need to walk a mile in our shoes and then need to be shot. Hang in there. Obviously you can choose to not send her what you said here in your blog, but I think you should. Not that she'd probably listen. *hugs* (And NEVER regret being public about your missing of your daughter. I've "lost" some "friends" on FB because of my own status messages, but I feel if I can't be honest about my daughter in front of my fb friends, then I shouldn't be honest about her anywhere else either & I should just deny her existence - which is the last thing I want to do. All the people who judge you for making the best decision for your daughter that you could at the time and for continuing to support that decision can go to hell.)Monikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09598390010327967653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3372499711594046882.post-41700857035546600682011-11-12T11:55:53.161-05:002011-11-12T11:55:53.161-05:00i think you handled that extremely well. stay stro...i think you handled that extremely well. stay strong and never falter in your confidence in ANY of your decisions. they belong to you and your daughter alone, and no one else (besides her bio father, and even him, not as much) don't let ignorant people like that hurt you. you did the best thing you could! xoAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com